On my mind.

Over the summer I was sitting with a few friends in my garage up to some foolery and I sat there and thought to myself for a minute. When I was younger living in the city I had one of my longest term friends even though we don’t speak or hangout as much as I’d like to anymore I’d still do anything for the kid but that’s past the point. He had two older brothers Dominic and Vince, they and their group of friends it consisted of about ten of them. They were always up to no good. Anything from breaking into old gas stations to record them skateboarding to drugs. Joey my good friend, my buddy Garrett, and myself all loved skateboarding at the time and we always looked up to them because they were all really good at it and we thought they were the coolest kids on Earth. My mom always warned us when we’re at Joeys not to hangout with them or really even talked to them. They were the kids parents would always warn their kids not to hangout with them because they were always up to no good or getting in trouble with the police. Just a few years ago from present time I recall my mom handing me a news paper and first asked if I recalled the person who’s mug shot was at the top of the page of the article. I looked and it was a kid from right down the street who hung out with my buddies brother his name was Marshall. I asked if it was him and she said yes and told me to read the article. So I began to read it took me about five minutes to finish reading it. To make a long story short he was doing a drug deal at 3 AM and it got ugly for whatever reason and he ended up killing the guy with his car while Joey’s brother Dominic was in the car. Dom went down for an accomplice and Marshall is doing life currently, he was 20 years old he was sentenced. It’s crazy how these kids didn’t know we looked up to them so much. Maybe if they knew they wouldn’t have acted so stupid. Then again I didn’t think anybody looked up to me while I was out there screwing up. Until I found my little brother stealing my old cigarette butts. He’s in 8th grade the same age as me when I did the same thing and fucked up the next four years of my life. I pulled him aside one day when I caught him in the act and told him he has one chance not to do it again, one freebie before I went to our mom. After an hour long talk with him about how I messed up my life I have not seen him try to pick up a cigarette butt again. It’s just insane how you think what you do only will impact yourself and don’t even think if a little kid sees you they’re going to think it’s cool. But back to the point as I was looking back I thought of all of this, then myself. I got involved with drugs at an early age like them, had prior experiences with police and probation just like they all did. I sat and thought to myself I became the kid that parents warn their kids to hangout. There is no worse feeling in the world then realizing that that’s how people and their parents look at you. Since that little epiphany I personally think I’ve done a really good job in changing a lot of peoples views on me. That is the most rewarding feeling I’ve felt.

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On my mind.

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